it could be raining men and id still be single
everyone says “just get out and leave everything behind in the event of a house fire” like no fuck that shit im grabbing every electronic i can hold
(Source: tempooooooooes)
cosmo tip #692
tell him his dick should be on america’s next top model
what happens if he loses
he doesn’t get to be on top
(Source: jsounthone)
my mom is trying to pick a colour for her new wheelchair and me and my dad are telling her to get black and she’s just like “but how will I know if someone is stealing it” and my dad is just like “because you’ll be sitting on the floor” and she slapped him
i had no idea this site cost 1.1 billion i bet its because of my blog
